So I am doing a small Triathlon this Sunday. Swimming 300 meters, biking 12 miles and running/walking 2 miles. I say running/walking because I don't anticipate running the whole thing :) My goal is to finish and have fun.
I started the process of training about a month ago with Mr. C's help (a fellow teacher and friend). I decided to do it because I wanted to show my kids that dedication, perseverance, hard work and completing goals is possible. All the time they say "I can't do it." "This is too hard". I got tired of asking them to do things that I myself wasn't doing in my life. I was asking my students to show self discipline, finish goals and persevere when it got hard, when I was not doing this in my personal life. You see I am a big idea, starter type who does not always finish the goals I set for myself.
The funny thing about this whole experience happened yesterday. So all year I have been telling my students these things, and most of them actually finished out the year doing great on their TAKS tests and finishing all their work to move onto the next grade. We celebrated this on Thursday going to the park and cooking out. Then they went home (sad to say goodbye). I was so proud of them and amazed to see all that God had done in each of their lives throughout the year. They where not the same kids I had in the beginning and many had to overcome a lot of negativity to change attitudes and finish. So Friday was clean up day at school. I decided to go swimming that morning to 'practice' before Sunday. It was so hard to swim. What was to be my easiest sport in the tri, was difficult to complete. Seed of doubt was planted, and I questioned if I could do this. Then I rushed home to get ready to go work up at school. I didn't make time to spend with the Lord (reading and praying), seed planted of chaos and overwhelming anxiety about everything going on in this next week. I then went to school and walked into my classroom, I HAVE SO MUCH STUFF!!! Seed planted of time needed and organization of things so that I can be better prepared for next year. Instead of stopping and praying and realizing what was going on I let these seeds grow throughout the day and I was a walking mess at school. **Side note I have an amazing group of coworkers!!** My coworkers would look at me and ask what was wrong and I would unload everything that I was thinking at the time. By the end of the day I was so full of anxiety, doubt and overwhelmed that I decided to give up and not to do the tri.
I tell this story not to confess or unload my junk on you, but to say I understand where the kids are coming from, when they look at the mount of goals and expectations we set before them and give up before they even start or are about to finish. This is an amazing lesson to learn as a teacher. If I am going to teach my students to be self disciplined and finish goals and persevere I need to do the same. I cannot give up when things get hard or it seems impossible to finish. I serve a bigger God than that who tells me not to worry because I am taken care of. To keep my eyes on his righteousness and kingdom and all things will be taken care of. Let me tell you how God took care of me in my anxiousness and self pity.
1. My coworkers swarmed my room and helped me clean and finish report cards selflessly in the midst of my selfishness. They listened to me and spoke words of wisdom about not overwhelming myself in the future.
2. My friend Allison patiently listened to my whining and attempt to give up and spoke truth to me.
3. Both of my roommates reminded me why I am doing this and how I need to finish my goals, unless I wanted to be known as a hypocrite. And one even volunteered to take care of my crazy dog.
4. Mr. C reminded me that I have no reason to quit.
5. God spoke truth to me about my time being his and that my goal is to serve him.
So I am doing the tri tomorrow. This is the beginning of many adventures I am having this summer. I keep praying for the Lord to beat my body and mind into submission. I am thankful for his patience and perseverance to make me into Christ likeness. I am thankful for his surrounding me with friends and coworkers who are amazing, listen and care when I am a mess. I deserve none of this, yet he gives in abundance.
Thank you Lord for your abundant grace and sufficient provision.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
God will give you the strength to endure the path before you, literally and figuratively. I'm glad He gave you wisdom to make the best choice. I'm proud of you for choosing the hard course in order to be faithful to Him and true to yourself. No matter the outcome, He is glorified through you! I pray the other events of the weekend go well also. Walk (run, swim and bike!) with Him!
Thanks for your honesty Anna! I can see God working through this whole process ....He is being glorified in this! No matter the final outcome of the race tomorrow, you are running the race for Him and in His strength and in that case, so only good results can come from this.:-) Keep your eyes on the prize! I'm excited for you, and praying for you!
I love your blog! A good reminder of many important things. I really like how you set an example for your kids with being self disciplined! Hope your triathlon went well!
Post a Comment